Missing in action
by Susan Rodriguez

All the problems with our new house seemed to die down for a while, until I noticed that my husband had disappeared. I couldn’t understand why he was taking so long to get home after he had told me he was on his way hours ago. It turns out, he passed out in the driveway. After re-peatedly trying to call him, the sound of the ringing of his cell phone snapped him out of it. When I finally got to him, he asked what took me so long. He ended up falling into a hole in our driveway, and breaking his foot. We have the bone chip as a memento in the freezer next to the ice cubes.

As if this wasn’t bad enough, we also had a little fire trouble. Did you ever see the knobs of a gas grill fly like projectiles across your deck? I got to experience this last summer. By the way, I’m still finding fine yellow dust from that fire. And after that incident, and the time I inadvertently cooked my favorite oven mitts for dinner, I’m now a pro with a fire extinguisher.